Majorly PO'ed!!!!!!

[Kent]

I'm so mad I just can't stand it!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Dear son decides to leave the wife this week and move back home. ( I knew this would happen years ago)

No problem I'm more than happy to help him get his life together and move on. BUT and this is a big but. He could have left his pit bull with his wife (they both need training)

Awoke this morning to find the damn dog running rampid through my seedling beds and eating all the plants I had planned to take to First Look

I am so furious I just don't know what to do. If my grandchildren didn't love this dog so much I would just take him to the SPCA.

My son's response was..."Well dad, if you had a lawn the dog wouldn't have made that mess"


They both might be out at the curb tomorrow!!!!!


Well...I'm done venting.

Kent

[addieotto]

OMG Kent!

If it was me, I'd say return dog to ex-wife until he's ready to have his own place for the dog to wreck. But I don't have kids either young or grown so who am I to talk.

I do have four dogs though... but they have THEIR YARD and my hostas have THEIR OWN YARD and NEITHER OF WHICH IS A LAWN. I just had to move an entire hosta bed because a new dog of ours was getting into one of the beds located in their yard.

Despite the fact I work with dogs for a living, I day dream about a day when maybe I just have cats around the house. Only one of my dogs is well behaved and trained enough to be near the plants but only when chaperoned.

[newtohosta-no more]

Oh no!!! How horrible!! And it's your fault because you don't have a lawn for a dog that's not yours to romp in???? Am I missing something here? Is your son too old to turn over your knee and give him a few whacks on the bottom? I'm really sorry the dog messed up your plants, Kent. I feel for you.

[Kent]

What amazes me the most, is I have two dogs that have lived with us for years and never have they botherd my plants or ran through the garden.

This dog needs training!!!

My son needs training!!!

EX DIL needs training!!!

EX DIL said she would kill the dog (reminds her of my son she says ) hence the reason for the damn dog being at my house!

The things we do for our kids!!!

Kent

[LucyGoose]

Oh Wow!!

Yes, that boy should be whipped...He should not have let the dog out without him watching it.....Wow, I feel bad for you....I am sure he knows better....I makes me feel sick for you....

So sorry, Kent!!!!

[wzbt03]

Yes, I would have been very upset too.

This year our puppy is eleven months old and seems to have no interest in the hostas.
Last summer she ate a full size Tokadama flavocircinalis and a Frances Williams. I had my doubts this spring.
This season she much prefers my ornamental grasses.

[Roxanne]

Gosh Kent, I am really sorry about this. Do you have a spot where you can put a heavy chain so the dog can go outside but not run free?

Your son obviously cares only about his own dilemma right now, simply because he made the comment about your yard. That made what the dog did seem "ok" in his mind, furthermore--you have had this Hosta obsession/hobby for years, your son HAS to know how upset you are.

You need to lay out rules right now, including how long he can stay in your home. He's a big boy. Your son needs to take charge of his own life, and that includes the dog!
I know you love him, but sometimes tough love is the best answer. Yep.....the things we do for our kids... and siblings....!! I have one living here right now who seperated from his wife in Febuary. I said OK, but He has until June 1st to find a place to live, because our lives have been turned upside down by having another person in the home, and I am counting the days....!

I hope some of your plants are ok, anyway.

[Wanda]

Well, either you can grab him by the ears and give him the refresher course on personal responsibility and decent behavior or you can kick him out onto the streets and let the world beat the message home. It has to be done.
Rule #1: Dog is outside only on a leash with your son on the other end every moment. It is the law in most areas anyways. Period. No exceptions. Since the dog hasn’t been properly trained, what if it gets a hold of a kid like it did the hosta? If it happens on your property, YOU may be held liable.
Rule #2: Son pays for any damage his dog causes, just as anyone else would be expected to do. Period. No exceptions. If he ain’t got the money...well, every garden needs grunt labor...lots of grunt labor. (hehe) And if the dog needs lawn...your son can take him to a park. You won’t be doing your son any favors by giving him a sense of perpetual entitlement to lack of responsibility. Better he learns it from you in a somewhat civil manner than to have the world kick him in the teeth when he tries that sort of behavior with others.

I am so terribly sorry about your hosta, Kent! I just can’t believe your self-restraint! Would have loved to have seen him skidding past here after a swift kick “you know where” at the very least! If you need a Split Decision for something, let me know...the one here is SPECTACULAR this year!

wanda
shaking her head...

[nanny_56]

Now I feel bad for celebrating here, as we are into our 2nd week of being empty nesters again, since GD's have gone back to live with their mom.

Bottom line, it is YOUR house and you know what, the kids will survive without the dog. What if he can't take it with him when he moves out?????

Don't surrender your life!! I could tell you some real horror stories of what all our daughter put us through the last 10 years. When FINALLY decided about 2 years ago to take back control of our lives, she started to straighten up!!

Claudia

[MollyD]

Kent,

I fully agree with Wanda and Nanny. If a son is grown up enough to have been married then he's grown up enough to take responsibility for himself and his pet.
You did him a favor allowing him to move back into YOUR HOME (not his any longer) and he needs to learn to respect this fact. His attitude towards the damage his dog did is reprenhensible. Not only did he condone it but he attempted to pass the blame onto you.
Not only should you make him pay in one way or another for the damages but you should insist that his dog is sent to a kennel for boarding till your son has his OWN HOME to which he can bring HIS DOG. Dog training isn't the issue here. Son training is.
Sorry but I have two grown sons one of whom is married and has pets. I would never tolerate such behavior from either son no matter what the situation. If I didn't exist would any friend allow them to move in and let their pets destroy that person's property? I think not!

MollyD

[pauhaus]

Man, oh man, Kent, that is terrible. Very sorry to hear about your plants. I hope things work out for the best for everyone very soon. Any chance the plants will recover by the time First Look begins?

[Jaspersail]

Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!

So sorry, Kent. Hope things look better in the morning...

--John

[bengal]

What a shame! I hope the plants will be able to recover quickly.

But it's not the poor dog's fault. He doesn't know a hosta from a dog treat. Your son needs to step up & take responsibility.

This statement:

Do you have a spot where you can put a heavy chain so the dog can go outside but not run free?

I must strongly disagree. One should never chain a dog....can result in neurotic and/or very aggressive behavior over time.

If I were you, I'd lay down the law: the dog must be taken on walks for his exercise. No running in the yard, even if your son is there. What ever happened to the idea of just putting on a leash and walking the dog? How hard is that? You don't let an animal run free and destroy someone else's property!

[John]

I'd be furious too. I won't express my feelings here about WHY people think they need a pit-bull, with all the other breeds from which to choose. Hope you come to some satisfactory conclusion.

[flowerchild59]

Boy Kent, that bites the big one.
I agree with some of the others. The dog is on a leash at all times. Also, many insurance companies charge you a premium for such aggessive dogs and there may be a ban in your city on pit bulls. Check on the liability since he is at your house. Don't get yourself into a bad situation with the dog attacking someone or worse, a child.
Check out pit bull rescues. Maybe he can go away permanently.

[largosmom]

Aw geez, Kent. That just stinks.

No advice on child or dog care, tons of sympathy...and a bit of disappointment that so many people won't be able to see this year's creations. Hope they make a recovery after their stomping.

Laura

[eastwood2007]

Soooo sorry, Kent! I could feel your pain as you described it! I hope for perfect growing conditions from now till First Look, and that the beauties will be presentable. Wishing the best...

[jgh]

Laura said it before I got it typed out... no advice, just sympathy. As a parent... and a former empty nester with a boomerang 25-year-old... I feel your pain.

I put this in the same category as a hailstorm or earthquake. You love your kids, you do stuff for them, they take you for granted... I'm reminded of Shel Silverstein's Giving Tree - if you don't know it, check it out. Anyway, you know you are doing what you have to do... and then you pay a price like this that you really really really don't want to pay. So sorry...

[Tigger]

Hugs, Kent.

Two words for your son: ground rules. In this case, to be taken literally. But what's done is done. I'm sure this cuts back a little on your sympathy for him, though.

[renaldo75]

I'm so sorry that this happened, Kent!! I don't know what else to say that hasn't already been said.