Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

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jgh
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Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by jgh »

Hi, friends!

The Idiots are on the move again... hope some might enjoy these episodes!

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Idiots at the End of the World Episode 1

In the early 1950s, the Cunard Line saw the writing on the wall. Their slow oceanliner crossings of the oceans would soon face stiff competition from the budding commercial airlines. Flying had a huge edge in speed and convenience. What could ships offer to convince people to make long slow crossings, complete with seasickness and icebergs?

The Cunard Line created a brilliant advertising campaign - “Getting There is Half the Fun!” Sure you could fly across the ocean – an uncomfortable ride in a dangerous machine in the sky... or you could have a relaxing vacation with recreation and elegance and great food.

Speed and convenience won the day. For a while, the airlines tried to present themselves as a civilized way to travel. Western Airlines television advertising featured a bird with a British accent sitting on a plane... most often leaning back against the tail with a glass of champagne, saying “Western Airlines – the ooooonly way to fly!” But over the years the seats got smaller, the legroom shrunk, and extra charges crept in. In recent years the Idiots have taken to not using the term “coach” - replacing it with “steerage.” The call “boarding” the “cattle call.”

Two years ago the Idiots spent a little extra money to make the brutal long flight from LA to Hong Kong a little more tolerable. They flew Premium Economy on a 787 Dreamliner with Cathay Pacific. The wider seats and greater recline and better food did make the trip more pleasant, though it was still grueling. But Idiot She got a peek at the First/Business class section – individual pods with great legroom and comfortable seats that reclined to a flat sleeping surface – and she remarked that just once she would like to fly in a First Class pod.

Fast forward two years. Idiot He was planning a trip to South America and was looking into Premium Economy flights. As he worked on the flights, he received an email promotion with the option of buying “miles” on America Airlines that included a discount AND a whole bunch of extra miles. He found that by purchasing the maximum he could get sufficient miles to not only fly first class to South America but also have almost enough left for a domestic flight.

The die was cast. Idiot She would get her wish. The Idiots would become pod people!

The Idiots had a very comfortable ride from Tucson to Dallas, then found the Ambassadors Club... American Airlines hoity-toity alternative to waiting in uncomfortable seats in a crowded gate area. Free food, free drinks, comfortable seating, soft lighting... very civilized. They snacked on Southwestern Chicken and Lime-Cilantro Rice... not too much so they wouldn't spoil the first class meal on the plane. A relaxing Campari and soda set the right tone. And then they were off to their pods.

The first photo of the trip – a terrible Idiot He selfie as he visited Idiot She and toasted their trip with champagne before take-off.


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Great legroom – and a shelf that becomes part of the flat bed arrangemnt.


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Idiot He was intrigued by the windows with no shades – darkening was controlled by the touchscreen.


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The salad was good and the appetizer – smoked carrots with goat cheese was excellent! The main course – filet mignon with twice-baked potato was consumed before Idiot He thought about a picture. No surprise it was accompanied by a fine Argentinian Malbec. For desert, both Idiots chose the passion fruit cake – exceptional!


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After dinner, Idiot He finished Crazy Rich Asians on his private flatscreen, using the provided Bose noise-cancelling headphones... caught a glimpse of Guatemala City far below glowing in the dark night, then he set up his CPAP and oxygen machine and got several hours of good sleep. He was awakened for a fine breakfast. As the morning light came up, his windows revealed clouds over the Pacific and the starkly beautiful terrain of Chile.


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Alas – the flight attendant did not wake up Idiot She and she missed breakfast, and had to settle for a cranberry roll just prior to landing. Landing at Santiago they were greeted with a reliable irritation – long twisting lines and slow immigration officers.


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The taxi delivered the Idiots to their apartment for the following four nights in the heart of Santiago. An old building with simple features, but everything they would need and convenient to coffee shops, restaurants, and the Metro. The entire neighborhood had a sense of “shabby chic” and the apartment a blend of old fashioned cove ceilings and parquet floors – and bathroom and kitchen done in red, black, and white tile with quirky light fixtures. A pair of pigeons kept watch on the kitchen – cuter in theory than in practice when the Idiots realized their windows opened into an enclosed air shaft area with pigeons – with metal security bars but no screens. Like most old buildings in Santiago, there was no air conditioning. Still – in sweltering Santiago summer, one must take air where one can get it. The pigeons and the Idiots practiced detant – each party stuck to their own areas. No pigeons were harmed in the making of this adventure.

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Haricotsv2
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by Haricotsv2 »

So excited! :)
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thy
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by thy »

Have a great trip :-)
Against stupidity the gods themselves struggle in vain.
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Chris_W
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by Chris_W »

Have a lot of fun!
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Vawagner
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by Vawagner »

Your trip looks amazing! My husband and I hope to travel this spring to Italy. Your flight looks amazing. The food looks good too. Have a great time.
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kHT
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by kHT »

Yea, an adventure!!
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LucyGoose
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by LucyGoose »

Have fun!!! :beer:
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Re: Idiots at the End of the Earth Ep. 1

Post by Tigger »

I knew I loved you. Then you said Campari and soda. :beer:
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